5 Steps for Rewiring Negative Associations
Have you ever had a difficult experience and then felt stressed every time you’ve thought about being in a similar situation again? That is an example of the neuroplasticity adage, “Neurons that fire together, wire together.” In your survival brain, the situation where you had a difficult experience has become linked with stress chemistry in your body.
Sometimes this is helpful, because we really do want to avoid that kind of situation again. Other times, it isn’t helpful, because our automatic negative reaction can keep us from doing things that actually are in our best interest.
Fortunately, we can tap into the abilities of the modern parts of our brains, such as the prefrontal cortex, to rewire unhelpful associations. With conscious attention and repetition, we can create new neural pathways.
As an example, let’s use a situation that many people have negative associations with - going to the dentist. Maybe you have had times in the past where you felt stressed in the dental chair. Now when you even think about going to the dentist you feel anxious. To your survival brain, dentist = stress.
Here are some ways to rewire your negative associations using the dentist example:
Use your prefrontal cortex to think rationally about the situation. Use this part of your brain to get in touch with your “why” - what is your motivation for rewiring this negative association? For example, your prefrontal cortex knows that going to the dentist might not be your favorite way to spend time, but it is important for the long-term health of your teeth and the rest of your body. Get clear on why it is important to you to create new helpful neural pathways about this situation.
Recognize that your survival brain just wants to keep you safe. In this case, it is trying to keep you from doing something that has created unpleasant emotions in the past. Our survival brains are always trying to protect us in the best way they know how. It’s up to us to activate the modern parts of our brain to create new wires.
Use the power of positive visualization to create new associations. Your survival brain doesn’t know the difference between something that is actually happening and something you are imagining. Your can use this to your benefit by employing positive visualization. There are lots of ways to do this. For example, several times a day, close your eyes and spend a few minutes imagining the dental office. See it filled with things you have happy associations with, such as beautiful flowers, a beloved pet, a favorite beach - anything that makes you smile. In your visualizations, the more senses you can involve and the more strong positive emotion you can generate, the more effective this will be. This starts to create new, positive associations in your brain with the dentist office.
Positive self-talk. Come up with some short phrases to repeat to yourself whenever you think about going to the dentist, such as “I am grateful to have access to good dental care. I am so happy to take good care of my body by going to the dentist. Everyone in the dental office is friendly and helpful.”
Use stop-stop-stop. Whenever your survival brain wants to go down the old, fearful pathways, it can be very helpful to speak directly to that part of the brain, saying something like “Stop, stop, stop. We’re not going down those old unhelpful pathways.” Then repeat the positive self-talk phrases, use the positive visualizations you’ve been practicing - do whatever it takes to keep your survival brain from taking you down those old negative neural pathways.
You can use these strategies with any situation that makes you anxious. Maybe something happened at work that you didn’t feel great about, and now you feel stressed whenever you think about that situation, or something similar. Maybe you had a challenging experience in a doctor’s office, and now you feel stressed thinking about going to the doctor.
We have the ability to use our modern brains to rewire negative associations created by our survival brains, so we can be free of unhelpful automatic, negative reactions to situations that actually are in our best interest.
Note: people who have experienced trauma in their lives sometimes need more intensive help to rewire associations their survival brain has made. Please seek out whatever help you need.
I’d love to hear from you! Please send your questions, comments, and suggestions to liz@happybrainlife.com.
Have a wonderful day!
Liz
